Time Magazine’s May issue was perhaps the greatest summary of different views and
realities about campus sexual violence over the past year.
Along with being one of the most awkward
purchases of my life (the Barnes and Noble cashier only saw the giant “RAPE”
flag on the front and was a little afraid), the “Debate” section really opened
my eyes to some different opinions.
Naturally,
one made me angry. A criminal defense
lawyer gave the following opinion.
“Colleges will risk
sanction by the Department of Education if they don’t take action in favor of
women who report sexual assault. The
school’s incentive is to set up a process that results in guilt. One way schools accomplish this is by
defining sexual assault as sex with any one who has been drinking. But drunk sex isn’t what Joe Biden is talking
about. The ‘drunk sex=rape’ rule is
systematically unfair to male students, especially when we all know drunk sex
is common in college. When my daughter
leaves for college, I want her to be protected from sexual assault. But when my son goes to college, I want him
to not risk his future whenever he has sex after a party. And based on the cases I’ve seen, I’m more
concerned for my son than my daughter”
Initial rage-summary: I’m more concerned that my son will be in
trouble for fucking anything that moves without any regard for consequence than
I am about my daughter being raped.
But
seriously, I actually want to unpack this step by step (SO THAT WE CAN GO
DEEPER).
(1) “The school’s incentive is to set up
process resulting in guilt.”
Ugh,
no it isn’t. A school’s incentive is to
do whatever is attractive to incoming students.
That is to under-report rapes and therefore to set up a process
resulting in innocence. Whenever the
administration can say “oh, those crazy kids”, the school can just write it off
with a relatively clear conscience. In theory, colleges have always been at
risk for Department of Education sanction due to under or misreporting because
doing so is a Title IX violation (and they’ve known about it since 2011
according to TIME).
Sure
there is a little more drive and push after
55 schools have been publically
called out for being under investigation, but we all know that only a few will
actually be found “guilty” and it is really unlikely that federal funding will
be pulled.
(2) “Schools define rape as sex with anyone
who has been drinking.”
First
off, school’s tend to define rape as having sex with anyone who is unable to
give consent. Being drunk means you are
unable to give legal consent.
Notice
how these definitions are different. If
I go out and get drunk with my girlfriend of four years, and we both agree to
have sex when we get home, and then DO have sex when we get home, all else
being equal, it isn’t rape.
However,
if I just met a girl at a party and we are both drunk, maybe it is rape. OR at the very least, a truly well-meaning
good guy should be operating under the assumption that it might be.
But
how are guys supposed to make the kind of judgment call? I don’t know, the same way they decide not to
go on homicidal shooting sprees after a night of drinking. Which leads me to…
(3) The whole, “systematically unfair” and
“worried about my son” part.
Why
is this guy so afraid for his son? Let’s
disregard the whole part about how he is more concerned for his son’s (if history gives us any evidence) slap on
the wrist for being accused of rape than
for his daughter’s potential rape.
He claims
he is basing this fear off “the cases he’s seen”.
Now, as someone who makes a living defending
rapists… I mean men accused of rape, I could understand how you would be more
likely than others to find evidence that there are many women who lie.
But just like nurses who think full moons
bring out the craziest injuries, the data just doesn’t support it.
According to One in Four and a host of other
research,
less than 10% of all reported sexual violence cases are
unfounded.
It is important to note that this
statistic in its collection is likely flawed in a way that would make the
actual value even lower.
For example,
police officers may dismiss a sexual violence case if the victim has a prior
relationship to the assailant or if drugs or alcohol were involved.
You
could see why this would be a big problem at college.
Furthermore, David Lisak and other researchers have gone on to study perpetrators of sexual
violence. In their studies, as reported by TIME, somewhere
around 6% of men report rape perpetration behaviors, and half of those (3% of
men) report multiple offenses, with an average of 6 rapes each.
Why
is this important to our lawyer friend?
If drunk sex were so common in college, and it was so easy to conflate
drunk sex with rape, wouldn’t we expect to see these report behaviors way
higher than 6%? Or is it possible that
94% of men out there know when
something is wrong; that having sex with a woman who is too drunk to give
consent is wrong. The claim that these
policies are “systematically unfair” to men is only true if we admit that men
have no responsibility to be morally cognizant of the rights of those around
them.
There
is also the equally likely possibility is it possible that women aren’t falsifying reports (what!?!). There is some fear out there that women love
to make up rape stories. Why? Why would a woman’s desire to claim someone
raped her be any stronger than a man’s desire to say he was the victim of a
crime? Perhaps the nature of the crime
being difficult to prove and the social stigma placed on the accused…
Hmm…
how is that working out for them?
What should Mr. Lawyer’s take away be?
Rape
culture has created a world that has blinded you towards the truth of what is
happening. So much has been made of
campus sexual violence that a sensationalized media brings you stories of men falsely
accused of rape. Because these stories
are so accessible compared to the statistical reality, we cling to these and
claim they are the norm, plunging us into a world where women apparently love
to take time out of the best 4 years of their life to sit in front of some
deans and make up stories.
Rape
culture has created a world where we fear our sons will be accused of violence,
but lack the courage to ask ourselves whether we have prepared them to be good
men. Is it possible that they are capable of violence. Rape culture is when we say sexual assault
policies work systematically against men because we believe the only thing that
separates a rape from a drunken mistake is what side of the bed the girl wakes
up on the next morning, leaving good men “vulnerable”
It
is time for us to face reality, as represented by what we know from data and
facts.
Here’s
an uncomfortable truth, Mr. Lawyer. If
your son is accused of sexual assault in college, it’s probably because he did
it.